weak from drifting on the longest mosey ever rambled.
Weeks with no meal or beverage
blistering desert pounding me to the crosine-tipped brink of insanity
Yet, perhaps there is truth in sand madness.
s-a-n-d - m-a-d-n-e-s-s
f-e-e-d - m-e
s-a-n-d - m-a-d-n-e-s-s
You have rambled well, thus I shall answer questions three.
-Who am I? -I cannot tell you that, Sire.
-Where did I come from? -I cannot tell you that.
Cor, blimey! you have one question left.
Why are you pretending to be British?
I have always admired the British. You are out of questions
but your quest has just begun.
Who are you?
I guess it's true what they say about a camel's ass.
I am hungry.
Computer..Computer, come in.
-y-y-yes, Xavier? -Computer, I need sustenance to eat.
-turn
towards
your
left.
Let me get, uh, two packs of cigarettes before I go.
-I gotta warn you, they say every cigarette takes 17 minutes off your life.
-Well hey, if I keep smoking fast enough, I'll get younger
-Shit, you're a bad, little boy.
-Besides, they say every slice of bacon takes 9 minutes off your life.
I just chowed me down a year's worth.
-Shoot, you're a naughty boy.
I'd like to put your over my knee and spank you some.
-You keep your hands off him.
His bottom
is his personal, private place.
-How long you been standing there, you freak?
-What are you, a Chinaman?
-I wish I knew my self.
-We don't cotton to strange Chinamen with no sense of self,
who stand secretly by
for indeterminate amounts of time.
Gonna put you in a world of hurt.
Take that, taste the pain. Take that, taste the pain.
Take, take, take, take -Whoo boi!
See that basket of fries over there?
Well, it looks like this week Xavier's got hisself a basket of pain.
-Stop the talking! -Whoo boi!
-Look! There's been a significant discovery at an archaeological dig.
-Here to announce that we have discovered the oldest cave drawing known to man.
The figure is a rather ugly creature, possibly a Chinaman of some sort.
-Is this finally the clue to my mysterious origins?
-Yes, we're going to look closer, to look deeper for hidden meaning
-Gentlemen, I've got to take this, Gentlemen.
-Looks like you and me is all alone.
Now who's being naughty?
Frittata! Barracade.
Easy..
Eeeasy!
EEeasyyy..
Computer, Analysis
My
computer
is
down.
All I
can tell
you is-s-s:
Analyzing
the brush
strokes
on it
I-I-I-It's
forty-six
thou-
-sand
nine
h-h-h-h-h-
-undred and
thirty-nine
years
a-
nd-d-d-d
eight
y-tw
o
days
old.
-I'm going to have to
go back in time
and find who did this painting
and
what
it
means,
but how?
-Every cigarette takes 17 minutes off your life.
-Every slice of bacon takes 9 minutes off your life.
-Every cigarette takes 17 minutes off your life.
-Every slice of bacon takes 9 minutes off your life.
-Can you dumb it down a notch?
-If you smoke and eat bacon fast enough,
you can go back in time.
-Oooh, you are a bad, bad boy.
-Sayonara,
-Ooh,
Ooga booga.
Nimgok look goood.
-You leave that bicep alone,
That's your
personal, private place.
-Ooga booga, how long you stand there, freak?
You some kinda ooga booga Chinaman?
Me put you in world of hurt.
Take that, ooga booga, taste the pain
-Whoo boi! order up. Old Xavier's got another basket of pain fries on his plate
and the emotional ketchup is a blubbering wail of tears.
I'm not crying, I've just got something in my eye, just tears.
Why are you crying? -Why you crying?
-What's that bruise on your face?
-Ooga booga, what bruise on your face?
I just fell down..the cave stairs.
Ooga booga, me fell down cave stairs.
I may stink like cock
but I'm no spring chicken.
Is it a husband? boyfriend?
gal pal?
What's the matter, pussy got your tongue?
-Maybe.
It my husband. He only does 'cause he
love me. -No,
That's the stupidest thing I ever heard.
Maybe he does it because you're stupid.
-Maybe. -Well, if that's love,
then I'd like to make some love to his mouth.
-Maybe don't get him angry.
-From now on, I'm your guardian. I'll be standing right behind you
and if he wants to get to me,
he's gonna have to punch his way through you first.
-Maybe he do not mean to do it.
-Looks like he's done over twelve- hundred dollars worth of damage.
Far as I know, you were pretty before all of this started.
Maybe..
-Your quest is nearly complete.
The answer of your origin is nigh.
s-a-n-d- - -m-a-d-n-e-s-s
But can madness hold the truth?
Come, enter into
the world of hurt
-What is this place?
-This land is the physical manifestation
of brute, inarticulate rage.
-Yeah, no doi.
-That is the peak of disappointment.
and those are the nerve worms.
They're consuming the carcass of your contentment.
-You did this to me.
-This is the beach of unbearable facts.
-Your body stinks like egg.
-And this is the forest of Daddy's fist.
-Ow! Daddy!
No, Daddy!
-You wanted to know from whence you came.
If you dare, gaze into the lake of torturous truth.
This is your mother the night you were conceived.
-Hey everybody, let's get wasted tonight
and party!
Who wants more cherry wine?
-No, you're lying. This is a lie!
Let me out of here!
Yoohoo, let me out of here
-Yowch!
-Ooga booga, me think me hear wife in me cave
with 'nother man.
-Go on, I no longer fear your pain fries
-Whoo boi!
-for in pain, I've found the truth.
and even though pain hurts,
you need to confront pain
if you want to transcend the crushing pain
of you inner pain
-Nimgok want escape crushing inner pain, ooga booga.
-Well, look inside yourself. Why do you hurt people?
-'Cause Nimgok strong, ooga booga, Nimgok tough.
-But why do you feel the need to be tough?
-'Cause if me let me guard down, ooga booga,
I guess me vulnerable to get hurt meself.
-Go on.
-Ooga booga, maybe Nimgok fight because
when Nimgok punch someone, ooga booga,
Nimgok get to touch someone.
Me only hit you 'cause Nimgok love you.
-Now that's the smartest thing I ever heard.
If you're so tough, take up this feather and write what you feel.
That's right, keep going.
3..
2..
1..
Now, what do you have?
Me used to use violence,
ooga booga, as me protective shell, ooga booga.
but now me stow me fists for flight of life,
ooga booga, and let me heart scream and yell.
Jazz
Me let me spirit soar.
Me let me soul glide and shine.
-You just got in touch with someone very special.
-Who? Who? Me kill him.
-Yourself. -Booya!
You done so much for Nimgok.
You give Nimgok psycho spiritual breakthrough.
What can Nimgok do for you?
-I'm looking for a painting on the cave walls.
Have you seen it? It looks like this:
-Yeah, you just make painting.
Ooga booga.
Xavier
my datas
show that
y-y-y-you
did
the
drawing
yourself.
-You figured that out right after numb-nutted neander-balls.
Now, get me back home.
-The
bacon
is
still in
your system.
If you
get it out,
y-y-you might
be able
to
go
back.
He's a witch!
Get him! -I'd better get the hell out of here!
I just spent American money on a Nagel print.
Patrick Nagel just died.
Oh no,
It looks like I went a little too far.
Perhaps there is truth in sand madness.
s-a-n-d- - -m-a-d-n-e-s-s
f-e-e-d - m-e
I'm not going to make that mistake again.
w-i-l-l - y-o-u - f-e-e-d - m-e-?
c-o-m-e - c-l-o-s-e-r
BYE